There are no words to describe the pain of losing a baby while in the mother’s womb. As former President Ronald Reagan once said, a child who loses a parent is called an orphan, a couple who loses a partner is either a widow or widower, but for parents who lose a child, there is no word to describe them.
Stopping smoking is a struggle and not an easy journey at all. It requires a great deal of planning and willpower. A lot of people have tried and failed many times because they had underestimated their would-be journey to quitting.
Most women want things to always be in order. They love fixing and improving the people around them. This is one trait of the women which men hate the most.
Men see women as the nagger. When things go well for them, they blame the women for overthinking; but when things go wrong, they always expect women to forgive them. When women tell them, “I told you so” they will get pissed off, and in the end, it is still the women’s fault.
Research has demonstrated that cigarette smoking is the leading cause of preventable death in the United States, where more than 16 million Americans also suffer from a disease caused by smoking. — Key Sun Ph.D.
Today, I just lost my best friend and wife of 27 years to cancer. I’m completely speechless and can’t seem to find words to describe how I actually feel. I can blame no one but me because I am my best friend’s killer. Am I writing this to lessen my burden – or to get away with the guilt?
About a year ago, while on our daily morning walk, my wife complained of shortness of breath and heaviness in her chest, so I asked her to sit and relax for a moment. As we were sitting on the bench, I felt that her temperature was a bit hot. We then decided to go back home so she can take a rest. She took an over-the-counter analgesic for her fever, and after hours of rest, she felt better.
For a month, the fever would come and go, and then she developed a cough without phlegm. I asked her to have it checked by a physician, but she refused, thinking it was just an ordinary fever and cough brought by extreme weather condition changes. But it seemed that her condition was not getting any better, and she already lost some weight, and so we did visit our doctor.
She did some tests which were said to be normal except for an imbalance in her thyroid test. She was given vitamins and some medications to correct the imbalance and was placed on a diet. We came back for a followup. Her condition this time was no different from when we first had our first visit. They did another test, and the result was something that we did not expect. She was positive for lung cancer.
It felt like a wave of darkness washed over me as we heard the news from her doctor. He gave us options and even told us to get a second opinion, and so we did. We sought a second opinion, and the result was the same, stage 2 lung cancer.
Toxic Chemicals Knocked Out Her Body
I wondered how that could be. My wife was very healthy and full of energy months before. She lived a healthy lifestyle and never had in her entire life dared to touch even a single butt of that cigarette. In fact, it was her who influenced me to stop smoking when our two girls started going to school. The doctor told me that it must be it. The secondhand smoke that I caused her to be sick took its toll on her life. My wife kept on saying that it was bad for my health, I never realized it was bad for her, too, and she was the one who suffered while I was smoking my cigars.
Anyway, think for a moment about how very hard it is to measure one’s exposure to environmental tobacco smoke. The exposure of a woman married to a two-pack a day guy living in sunny SoCal where doors/windows remain open for much of the year will differ significantly from a similar wife living in Vermont where houses are sealed tight for the six-month winters. — Stephen Mason Ph.D.
I did not know that every cigarette I smoked contained 7000 toxic chemicals, and 70 of those could have caused my wife’s cancer. It was more harmful to her because she did not only inhale the smoke from my cigarette, but she was also taking in the smoke that I breathed out, and the toxins left in the air must have entered her body, too, through her mouth.
Holistic Treatment Is Not For Everyone
We sought different kinds of treatment except for chemotherapy. My wife was so slim that she never wanted to consider the idea of having chemotherapy. She was afraid she might not be able to tolerate it with her frail body. We resorted to alternative treatment. She took in organic greens daily prepared by a dietitian in her own farm, which was part of the holistic cancer treatment and cleansing. This type of treatment was proven effective for others, but unfortunately, it did not work for her. It was too late when we came back to her doctor as her cancer was already in its end-stage.
I was enjoying my cigarettes, unaware that I was slowly killing the love of my life. There’s no turning back for me as she was eaten up by cancer. In less than a year, we were about to lose her. I can’t explain her pain as the cancer cells spread into her spine. All I could do was nothing, and I watched as I sat by her side the whole time until her doctor talked to me that they would put her in palliative care. They put her to sleep to ease the pain until she breathed her last breath. I felt her hands slowly letting go of me.
It may have been too late for my wife, but perhaps not yet for you. So if you’re holding your cigarette now, look at it very carefully and then look at your loved ones who are not enjoying that cigarette you’re lighting. They could be suffering more than you could ever imagine.
Overcoming an addiction involves more than initial abstinence or initial reduction. Working to develop a course of addiction therapy that also helps people stick with the change over time is essential. — John Smith Ph.D.
Quitting smoking is never easy because if it is, I would have stopped a long time ago. I have tried a dozen ways, but every attempt failed.
I started smoking when I was in my 20s. I started doing it to relieve stress from work. Smoking while working made me more creative and helped me concentrate and focus on my task. Because of the many benefits that I was getting from smoking, I never noticed that I already got addicted to it.
Quitting smoking is a perennially popular resolution and one that most people fail to achieve on their first attempt. — Glenn Sullivan Ph.D.
Have you recently started quitting smoking? Does it make you feel good that you have finally given up this bad habit? Are you having difficulty in continuing the process? Most importantly, do you find yourself in a situation where you are suffering from smoking relapse?
The American Cancer Society makes an effort to conduct programs and seminars with the goal of encouraging people to quit smoking. According to this organization, smoking can cause serious illnesses or diseases not only to those who do it but also even to non-smokers. Whether you believe it or not, smoking can give adverse effects for almost all organs in your body. Because of this, it is essential to quit this bad habit as early as possible.
Yearly, tobacco use is the reason for over 5 million deaths globally, and almost half of all cancer cases in the United States are associated with tobacco use. But despite the many advertisements about its negative effects, many are still hooked up to using tobacco, especially among the youth.
Smoking, similar to any form of addiction, is quick to acquire yet tricky to overcome. Your fingers feel empty without a cigarette stick; your senses look for the lingering smell of the smoke. Though it may take much effort for you to curb that hunger for nicotine, never try to go down that road again once you succeed.
The latter should be effortless for someone whose desire to stop smoking comes from the heart. It can be challenging for an ex-smoker, however, if you forget why you want to avoid taking a puff in the first place.
In hopes of helping your recollection, below are the ten mantras you should keep in mind.
- I Love Clean Air
Breathing comes easy when you fill your lungs with fresh air all the time. You can’t expect that to happen in case there’s often smoke around you. Remember that each time you feel like lighting a cigarette.
…keeping work areas—as well as rooms within the home—clean and pleasantly scented may go a long way toward producing desirable behavior from workers, customers, and family members, all at a minimum of cost and without the need for potential emotional fallout. — John Smith Ph.D.
- I Choose To Live Long
The lifespan of a person who smokes is relatively shorter than that of an individual who lives cleanly. It is definite that you want to extend your contract on this planet; that’s why you quit in the first place. Just don’t ever forget it.
- I’m Too Young To Die
Yes, you are. Regardless if you reach your 20s or 50s, you will still be too young to lose your life over a roll of burning tobacco. There are many dreams you can fulfill when you’re healthy, so scratch the idea of smoking again.
- My Family Is More Significant Than A Cigarette
Apart from yourself, your family members suffer from every cigarette you consume. Not only do you turn them into second-hand smokers; you also tend to spend a substantial amount of cash to sustain this habit.
- I Deserve To Be Healthy
You are entitled to do physical activities without running out of breath, have teeth that don’t become yellowish due to nicotine and maintain youthful skin. It’ll be challenging to achieve all that if you go back to your smoker self.
- I Can Accomplish More Without It
Smoking splices the oxygen supply that’s supposed to enter your brain. It results in having a short-term memory, which inhibits you from being more productive in general. You may even become forgetful – a behavior that’s not suitable for most industries.
Take up a new hobby or activity, or learn a new skill — the money you used to spend on cigarettes can pay for dance lessons, language programs, or a trip to someplace you’ve never been! — Glenn Sullivan Ph.D.
- I’m Happy This Way
Avoiding tobacco makes you light inside because you no longer gasp for air after walking for five minutes or deal with the low immune system. Stay as an ex-smoker if you still want that sensation to persist.
- I Don’t Need Cigarettes To Live
Stress encourages people to take a puff as the smoke sort of calms the nerves. In reality, you can find a million other ways to relieve tension. Eat a piece of chocolate, for instance, or meditate, or color pictures – any of these will enhance your mood too.
- I Value My Life
Your life is highly significant, especially since you can’t ask for another one once you lose it. Hold onto it well and let go of your smoking thoughts now.
- It’ll All Be Worth It
If you quit this habit for good, your health, relationships, and career will all get better in no time. You may get tempted to smoke along the way, but don’t give in to your urges. You can’t allow a single stick of dried leaves ruin your chances of experiencing such incredible things.
Brainstorm strategies that you can try that are agreeable to you. Go through this decision-making process with every cigarette during the day that you typically smoke, as well as those cigarettes that are less predictable but are usually triggered by stress. — Marni Amsellem, PhD
Research in laboratory settings consistently shows that what people say they want in a partner has virtually no bearing on who they actually choose to date. — Samantha Joel Ph.D.
One of the best feelings in this world is meeting someone whom you are comfortable to be around with. Falling in love with a person who completes you is such a fantastic opportunity, which can happen only once in a lifetime. As such, once you find this person, make sure to keep him around. However, it does not mean that you will just tolerate all the bad habits that you do not like about him. For example, if you are dating someone who enjoys smoking, do you consider this bad habit as a deal-breaker?